5 Ways to Become More Likeable

5 Ways to Become More Likeable

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Man is a social animal, as Aristotle once said. This want and need to belong and be accepted by others is what drives us to be civil toward others. In fact, there might be times when we want nothing but to see our intimidators get run over by a bus (yikes!) but we choose to endure the pressure and react in an amiable manner in order to merit niceties, as well. In order to achieve this kind of response from everyone we meet, we must strive to be likeable.

Now, likeability does not always entail that people will throw a party every time you come into the room. A person can be likeable yet not grandstanding. You don't really have to be popular to be one. All you need to do is adjust your attitude and outlook in life toward the positive. When you feel good about yourself and always look at the bright side of things, your likeability factor will naturally rise.

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Here are five ways to become more likeable in any situation.

1)  Think happy thoughts

According to Peter Pan, think happy thoughts and you will fly. This applies to your attitude toward the challenges that come your way. For instance, if you received low marks for your exam, don't think of it as the end of the world. Instead, be grateful it happened because it will motivate you to study harder and manage your time better next time. Behind every dark cloud is a silver lining. If you keep this as your mantra, you will never have to harbor depressing thoughts ever again.

2)  Contribute something

Whether its a group project or a personal endeavor, contributing something of value, no matter how small makes a big difference. If you compare a person who always mutters about how difficult a task is and a person who acknowledges the difficulty but tries to lighten the mood by finding humor in the activity, you'd want to go with the latter, right? If you want to be likeable, don't put others down and bear more weight on a challenging activity.

3)  Rein your insecurities in

There is none more annoying than a person who throws a pity party for himself or herself. Examples of insecure people are those who always have to be right at everything, those who always say 'just kidding' at the end of every comment, and those who do not know how to laugh at themselves and their mistakes. An insecure person is a crab. A crab is animal that brings everybody down when he or she is down. If you want to have more friends, don't be one. You don't have to apologize for everything you say with 'just kidding.'

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4)  Believe in what you are saying and stick to it

A person who keeps changing his or her opinion or merely mimics what other people are saying about a particular event or object not only has zero personality but a very low likeability rate, as well. You don't need to have an opinion about everything -- that would be equally annoying, but you don't need to say 'yes' to what others say either. You'll only end up looking like a desperate sycophant.

5)  Avoid judging others

Finally, if you don't want to be judged, don't judge. First impressions might sometimes put you off but it pays to know the other person better than to immediately make conclusions about his or her character. Judgmental people, if you notice, are the ones who usually eat alone at the cafeteria because his or her colleagues are tired of hearing him or her point out the flaws of others. Surely you don't want to be this person.

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A Happy You Is A Healthy You

You’ve heard your parents, doctors and health experts say that a good diet with exercise is the key to great health. Happiness, though, may be just as important.

Studies show that happy people are less likely to experience chronic illness or pain. They also tend to live longer.

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On the other hand, people who worry, have a hard time dealing with stress, and/or have pent-up anger and other negative emotions, are more likely to have illnesses like high blood pressure, allergies, constipation, indigestion, and body pain.

Negative emotions, much like bad eating habits, upset the acid-base balance of the body. A highly acidic environment in the body leads to sickness. And unhappiness causes toxins to flow and brings up acid levels in the body.

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Since unexpressed anger and resentment in particular do not have emotional outlets, the body instead manifests these through illness. So, if you have chronic respiratory allergy or back pain, for example, your physical condition may not only be the issue.

On the bright side, though, people with illnesses who release their negative emotions in healthy ways find that their symptoms disappear almost instantly.

So what to do if you are unhappy or experiencing negative emotions in general? Following these tips may help:

• Release anger in healthy ways. If you need to scream, scream. But do it privately. Screaming into a pillow is advisable especially when there are people outside the room.

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You can also write a letter to the person who hurt you. Release all your anger in it. Afterwards, tear up or burn the letter. Do not send it to the person. Talk to the person only once you are calm and can express your feelings in a constructive manner.

• Forgive. As the saying goes, “Unforgiveness is like drinking a poison and waiting for the other person to die.” Once you forgive, you will feel lighter, as though you have just been unburdened of a heavy load.

• Understand that you have no control over everything. Control only what you can, and leave the rest to the universe. Trust that everything will work out for the best.

• Be grateful for the things you have now. Make it a point to think of at least one thing you are grateful for everyday. This will put you in a positive frame of mind and bring good or better things to you.

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• Do positive self-talk. Understanding that good food nourishes the body, feed your mind with positive thoughts. Do this everyday, believe, and be amazed with the results.

• Surround yourself with positive people. Talk with people who believe in you and encourage you. Minimize contact with people who make you feel negative or deplete your energy.

• Get counseling if necessary. Should you have serious emotional issues, especially those stemming from childhood, it may be best to seek professional counseling to facilitate healing.
  

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